5771
5770
5769
5768
5767

Sale of Joseph –  Family is not Chosen, What a Family,The Cost of Fraternal Unity

 

Last week in Vayishlach we read about the brothers uniting in order to release a sister from the hands of Schem, an incident that ended with a massacre of the townspeople and the plundering the property of those who defiled their sister Dina. The reaction of their father, Jacob, is embarrassing, to the point of co-operation – “And Jacob said to Simeon and Levi: 'Ye have troubled me, to make me odious unto the inhabitants of the land, even unto the Canaanites and the Perizzites; and, I being few in number, they will gather themselves together against me and smite me; and I shall be destroyed, I and my house.” (Genesis 34:30).
It should be pointed out that Jacob, on his deathbed,  condemned unambiguously this act of the brothers and announced – “Simeon and Levi are brethren; weapons of violence their kinship. Let my soul not come into their council; unto their assembly let my glory not be united; for in their anger they slew men, and in their self-will they houghed oxen. Cursed be their anger, for it was fierce, and their wrath, for it was cruel; I will divide them in Jacob, and scatter them in Israel” (Genesis 49:5-7).

However, the parasha ends with a list of the kings of Edom and the message that is passed down is that there is a brother, Esau, he has a dynasty of eight kings, and one of his descendants is  Amalek! The land’s residents are represented by Schem, who defiled a daughter of Israel.
The enemy was identified!

 

Joseph and His Brethren Welcomed by Pharaoh, watercolor by James Tissot (ca. 1900).

Parashat Vayeshev starts with the Jacob’s desire to settle down: “And Jacob dwelt in the land of his father's sojournings, in the land of Canaan These are the generations of Jacob. Joseph, being seventeen years old, was feeding the flock with his brethren, being still a lad even with the sons of Bilhah, and with the sons of Zilpah, his father's wives; and Joseph brought evil report of them unto their father. Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age; and he made him a coat of many colours. And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him”. (Genesis 37:1-4).

Jacob, who is Israel, loves Joseph more then his other sons and as a result the brothers hate Joseph ”and could not speak peaceably unto him”/. As we know this hatred was the trigger for the brothers to unite and harm their brother Josef and father Jacob.
Here it becomes clear that the enemy is not from outside the family, the enemy is inside us.
The ‘unification of the family’ let to a massacre of Schem’s town residents and it will almost lead to the murder of a brother. it leads to the brother’s salel – to their pitiless behavior when they hear  their brother’s Joseph’s pleas (Genesis 42:21).
We can say the fact that these two parashot are in proximity to each other, requires us to reread parshat Vayishlach and find out why the family did not think of a different solution, why there was no- one to object to the decision of Simeon and Levi and why there was no-one to decry the act at the time.

 

 

One act leads to another.!
Jacob’s special attitude to Joseph repeats his ancestors’ behavior. We can see that in Genesis the motive of ‘preference’ – ‘choice’ repeats itself!
God prefers Abel’s  offering to Cain’s  offering, Abraham prefers Isaac to Ishmael, Isaac loves Esau, but learns to choose Jacob, Jacob chooses and prefers Joseph the son of Rachel over Lea’s sons, and at the end, when he blesses his grandchildren, Joseph’s sons, he crosses his hands and prefers/chooses Efraim the younger brother over Menashe the older.

The chosen is not the firstborn, he is the second, the young one. It seems that 'choice' is  the nature of the world!
I used to say that every day my sons and daughters (five of them) claim about everything...’Why wasn’t I chosen’, why was he / she chosen? My reply is that all of them are chosen, we do not prefer one over the other. usually they giggle when they hear this. What I mean by this is that this is not an unusual family situation, this is how thing are. It seems that our relationship as brothers and sisters, as sons and daughters to our parents is common to all families, the  shadow image of a family.
So what do we learn from it?

We will look into Cain and Abel’s story on one hand and into the story of Joseph and his brothers on the other. In the story of Cain and Abel it is said:
“And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering; but unto Cain and to his offering He had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell. And the LORD said unto Cain: 'Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?” (Genesis 4:4-6)
How did Cain know what God’s choice was?
It seems that the chosen and/or the not chosen always know.
Compared with Cain not knowing of God’s choice, the preference of Jacob was very clear to Joseph’s brothers: “Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age; and he made him a coat of many colours. And when his brethren saw that their father loved him more than all his brethren, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably unto him”. (Genesis 37:3-4). This hatred led the brothers’ wish  to kill Josef and only in the last moment was he sold as a slave. His father Jacob was told that “an evil beast hath devoured him;”. The end of the story is known Joseph revealed himself to his brothers and the family was united again in Egypt.

The question is how could the brothers look into Joseph’s eyes and how could he look at the brothers who sold him into slavery? The Torah is aware of this tension in the description of the dialogue between Joseph and his brothers when their father dies: “And when Joseph's brethren saw that their father was dead, they said: 'It may be that Joseph will hate us, and will fully requite us all the evil which we did unto him.' And they sent a message unto Joseph, saying: 'Thy father did command before he died, saying: So shall ye say unto Joseph: Forgive, I pray thee now, the transgression of thy brethren, and their sin, for that they did unto thee evil. And now, we pray thee, forgive the transgression of the servants of the God of thy father.' And Joseph wept when they spoke unto him. And his brethren also went and fell down before his face; and they said: 'Behold, we are thy bondmen.' And Joseph said unto them: 'Fear not; for am I in the place of God? And as for you, ye meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive. Now therefore fear ye not; I will sustain you, and your little ones.' And he comforted them, and spoke kindly unto them”. (Genesis 50:15-21).

Can we imagine Joseph and his brothers’ lives together while Jacob was still alive and especially after the father’s death?
The brothers cannot imagine that Joseph does not bear a grudge against them. Did they change their minds after Josef told them that: “God meant it for good”?
It seem that in life after the choice has been made, one must understand that this is the reality and it will always exists in relationships, whether in the open or hidden., we need to find out how to behave and what we can learn from this reality, and especially how to avoid hurting the chosen and/or the not chosen.

Every man needs to be chosen, his ambition is to be worthy to be chosen, and to make the choice of his heart.
The chosen’s duty is to look after the ‘not chosen’ and the ‘not chosen’ has to help the ‘chosen’ with his choice and make sure that the choice will not hurt him.
Joseph’s brothers have to understand why Joseph was  chosen, and what led them to their horrific behavior.  They have to find out what is the ‘good’ that was caused by the sale?

What can be the meaning of choice? Maybe the duty to look after the other!

In the Kiddush of Shabbat we say: “For You chose us, and sanctified us, out of all nations”. The essence of choosing, holiness, the fact  that this is the way we start every Shabbat and every holiday – forces us to be aware of the other’s existence.
The uniting of the brothers in Joseph’s sale has to hold our attention every time we unite, in order to find out if this uniting has a negative aspect.
It seems that our message from the behavior of our ancestors’ families is a prologue to the nature of choosing the people of Israel out of all peoples. The chosen people has to understand why it was chosen and especially its duty to find for itself what its duties are in its relationship with the not chosen.
Shabbat Shalom